Pastelland Forum

Having a girlfriend does not necessarily result in social development and not having one does not make you a weirdo.

I know your point is valid, but for the sake of clarity, the thing that I think will make me look like a weirdo isn't that I don't have a girlfriend, it's that I've never had a girlfriend.

As I've said before, being in a relationship just for the sake of being in a relationship is a wrong reason to be in a relationship.

Also, zomby, teenage girls generally suck at being decent human beings. Wait until college, there you'll find plenty of mature and smart young women who'll treat you with respect.

If I really just wanted to be in any relationship, I could definitely have a girlfriend right now. There's only a couple girls I've ever actually considered dating, pretty much because they aren't generic high-school girls who suck at being decent human beings. I guess the inner conflict for me is that I think it will be easier to get meaningful relationships if I have had relationships in the past, but I don't want any relationships that are not meaningful.

I know all the advice I'm getting here is good, but I'm just not entirely certain it applies to me... it isn't like any of you know the girl or anything, but I'll never really know whether or not I'm just trying to excuse myself so I can keep doing what I've been doing. It doesn't matter much anyway since she turned me down and nothing is likely to happen; I guess I'm just thinking aloud about all of this anyway.

zombyrus wrote:

Raxas wrote:Having a girlfriend does not necessarily result in social development and not having one does not make you a weirdo.

I know your point is valid, but for the sake of clarity, the thing that I think will make me look like a weirdo isn't that I don't have a girlfriend, it's that I've never had a girlfriend.

The point applies to that too.
The only thing that will make you a weirdo is you thinking you're a weirdo and acting like a weirdo.

Zomby, no one in the history of my entire teenage life has told me that it is weird that I haven't had a girlfriend before. There are plenty of people who really aren't too concerned with that part of others' lives, and if they're decent people in the first place, they probably only bother you about it because they think it'd be a nice experience for you.

The only thing that will make you a weirdo is you thinking you're a weirdo and acting like a weirdo.

I agree with that, and I do think I'm a pretty rad dude in most other respects, but given enough time I think it does become weird never to have had a girlfriend. It'll be probably five years before I really cross that threshold, I figure, but it's a thing that worries me. People don't really bother me about it but I guess I just bother myself about it.

It's not quite such an immense deal to me in real life but it's probably the main thing I'm going to be talking about on the relationship thread hahaha

I guess I just bother myself about it.

Why?

You're you, why would you have to date anyone at this age? Why would you even have to date anyone, ever? It's a matter of desire and opportunity, which you will most definitely get in near future. So why bother yourself with it? Just try to focus on other aspects of your life and eventually you'll find someone.

I've noticed that the people with the most success in the romance department are the ones who are happy either way.

Me too. Actually, on myself. I was miserable before and kind of addicted to this boy because he was my only fun in life, but now I opened up a bit to other people and made some friends so I'm a lot happier in general. In the meantime, my relationship with this boy improved dramatcially and now we're together, officially.

The only thing that will make you a weirdo is you thinking you're a weirdo and acting like a weirdo.

This is so true. Just. Yes.

Congrats, Sunday! (if I haven't congratulated you before )

Oh thanks

This is kind of funny seeing all those older posts about how I don't need a girlfriend to be happy and all that sort of thing, but I have a girlfriend now. She asked me out yesterday because it was my birthday. (It's not the same person who turned me down in February though; that'd just be weird at this point.)

Well, congrats, man! There sure is a different mindset between being single and in a relationship. Love changes people.

Love changes people.

I can't describe in words how much I agree.