Pastelland Forum

love how you put Bing as the last option XD

Hey, guys.

It's a me, I'm back.

Again? Damn, I need to stop quitting weeks after "returning"

I don't even know how to start this but... yeah. I'll presume that you all still remember me, even though it would be rather presumptuous, since assuming that nobody would remember me (when it's rarely if not never the case for any returning member in any such community) would be even more presumptuous, and I don't have anything new to talk about.

Except for a first-hand depression experience! Boy, it's been a f*ed up semester. I'm way better now, though!

I've been away from here - and most of the Internet as a whole, matter of fact, except for the usual YouTube channels - thanks to that inconvenience (to put it very mildly). That, at least, taught me a very important lesson that I should have learned roughly two years ago: follow your goddamn heart.

Very long story short: I was doing something that I KNEW was not what I wanted, but I THOUGHT it COULD lead me to where I wanted to be, instead of taking the actual straight path to that. lolnope

After a mixture of depression, solitude, anxiety, and about four months of doubting myself and my future, I jumped ship from where I was before and I'm much better for it. It won't be a "glorious" path, I'm not exactly graduating from a top-notch university, but I'm where I wanted to be. And I simply could not do that in said top-notch university where I was before, so... good riddance. Will hardly miss ye.

Heck, I was so lost that I couldn't bring myself to even indulge in the two things that I feel are the most "special" to me. First one is listening to My Morning Jacket albums, which I ocasionally share on the Good Music thread and I'm sure many of you have ignored at least once; it's just too special of a band for me, and to say that I wasn't in the mood to listen to their albums speaks volumes of how much of a wreck I was. The second one...

Submachine.
And Mateusz Skutnik games in general.

I haven't played any since, what, December 2016? I'm no Sublevel (lol), but that's a LOT of time without Skutnik-ism for me. I just couldn't find it in me to play them half-heartedly, and I'm missing them sorely now! At this point, "Submachine" entails the games as much as the community, so... I missed you nutjobs. <3

And, well, I could very well have made this comeback-thingy earlier. I didn't, because... I had no idea of what to write.

Yes, I know.
Shaddup.

So! Now that I at least expect to be replaying the whole damn archive again, and there's something about Mateusz launching a game featuring the Daymare 4 seaweed-thingy-guys, I guess I can just end the sappy stuff and say that it's damn good to be home again.

I promise I won't disappear without a word again.
Much love.

Hi Thunder! happy to see you back!

Hi Thunder! Don't think we've formally met before but still; welcome back! And even though I don't know you I'm happy to hear you're feeling much better than you did god knows I can relate

Hey Thunder, good to hear from you.

In case you need reassurance, I can tell you that a lot of times people don't seem to recognize that incomplete paths can also be seen as opportunities to find another way, and life is not nearly as linear as people think. I can empathize with you a lot.

That said, welcome back

Oh boy, its Thunder!

Apocrypha wrote:So that makes me wonder where else he's possibly going to find pictures.

Deep web? Dark web?

...

A library?

...

...

Bing?


I guess I just don't understand the method.

Google, Skyscapercity... and other... sources

What comes after the flash?

Welcome back! I haven't had the fortune! Hope to see you on future streams - IMHO they're the pinnacle of the community as it is meeting their creator as he is.

TL;DR at bottom

Oh, and. I don't mean to project anything, but I don't think it's off topic. Anyway, what I have learned from a pair of major experiences is that no matter how shit it feels, or how ostracized you feel you become;
I) You are going to get better, and people will be happy to see you back. There's no guarantee that they will stick around during it, but your family will most likely suffer this with you. I've lived with mine both times.
II) Depression is not a state of mind, it's most often a chemical signaling error in your brain. It's an affliction. Not a feeling. Most of the world still can't wrap their head around this.
III) It can sometimes be seen as a good experience - what do I do to not mess my brain up again? Coming in and out of depression, I've found that there are some ways in how my brain works, and I know how to navigate it better now.

Anyway, I'm so glad you've found your way up on your steady feet! Knowing what it is in your heart that you want to follow is an awesome feeling. We have all been down under, (not the Men at work song nor the country) and we will all get there in the end.

TL;DR Depression is an illness that sucks, but could not suck.

@Apo not to be that guy, but giving the monopoly to Google is kinda dumb. The WWW is a lot more than a search engine. Speaking of which, I use DuckDuckGo, which in fact, doesn't trace you or sell your soul for advertising purposes. In extension, the open source browser Waterfox is excellent. *laughs evilly in private*

Welcome to your home, scary Thunder!

Coolest av!

singing along to one of my favortie bands and it feels so gudddddddddddd. I haven't sung in ages but I still got it